‘Glastonbury 2019’ – Brighton & Hove News have got it covered!

Posted On 25 Jun 2019 at 10:13 pm
Glastonbury (pic Sara-Louise Bowrey Photography)

We’ve done the number crunching and the stats behind the sheer quantity of entertainment available at Glastonbury Festival 2019 are simply staggering.

Having pulled apart the published running times and put them back together again we can tell you that if you put every piece of programmed music, comedy, circus, poetry, theatre, film, and debate back to back and tried to watch it all it would take you a staggering…

…quarter of a million minutes

(well, 249,984 anyway from the programme – but remember all the little pop-up shows that never get announced until they happen, so in reality it’s a lot more)

That’s…

4,070.4 hours

Or looked at in another way…

169.6 days

The equivalent of…

24.2 weeks

or about…

Five and a half months!

So if you were going to set yourself this mammoth challenge the first thing you’d be doing would be spending several days mesmerised by the interactive ‘Aqua Rhythm‘ fountains over in Glebeland from 8am on Wednesday.

As for music – well the first live show you’d be seeing is anybody’s guess, because it will be a Wednesday morning open mic slot on the Croissant Neuf Bandstand at 11am.

At the other end of the Glastonbury universe, almost six months later (with no sleep or breaks for food or the bathroom of course), the last man standing will be ‘DJ Badly‘ signing off from the 2019 show at Heds Party…wrapping up the festival as he closes the show at 7am on Monday morning.

In total over your marathon festival binge you’ll eventually see around…

1,968 different acts or shows.

Although with some playing many times there will be some repetition. Mik Artistik’s Ego Trip, for instance, will pleasure you on no less than eleven occasions (and each will be as good as the one before)…

WEDNESDAY 16:00 CROISSANT NEUF BANDSTAND

THURSDAY 15:20 THE GATEWAY

THURSDAY 20:00 THE ROCKET LOUNGE

THURSDAY 22:30 THE OPEN ARMS

FRIDAY 15:00 RABBIT HOLE

FRIDAY 18:35 THE SUMMER HOUSE

SATURDAY 15:40 SENSATION SEEKERS STAGE

SATURDAY 18:35 THE SUMMER HOUSE

SATURDAY 20:00 THE SPIKE

SUNDAY 14:00 THE BANDSTAND

SUNDAY 18:35 THE SUMMER HOUSE

And whereas Mik is really putting in the hours, down at the other end of the charts we have The Ooh La Las – whose cabaret show may be repeated (twice) but lasts a mere…

…three minutes!

More esoterically, and just for comparison, working on an average of three people per act and an average height of 165cm per performer (luckily Muse aren’t playing or Matt Bellamy would have pulled the average down considerably…) that means that if you stood all of the artists in a big wobbly tower of talent it would dwarf Everest by almost a kilometre…

9.74Km of performers

But the sobering thought is that based on four to five hours sleep per day and achieving a gallant 45 minutes in every hour of watching stuff the VERY most of the festival that any one person is ever likely to actually see at Glastonbury is a MINISCULE…

0.34% of everything that happens…

However if you could do the lot the grand total for the number of shows you’ll eventually sit through is a whopping…

3,622 performances.

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