Drones styled as seagulls will be used to collect recycling in Brighton and Hove in a pilot scheme launching this month.
The trials will start next week in the Hanover area and if successful, “seagull-cycling” will be rolled out citywide in 2026.
Lead councillor for Refuse and Recycling Quentin Prole (Labour) says advances in battery technology make this a viable option and will also bypass historical problems with the unions and CityClean.
He said: “I refuse to refuse that refuse shouldn’t take to the skies!
“All recycling bins will need to be placed on innovative eco-launchpads no less than eighteen centimetres away from fences, walls, trees, the under-10s, Chelsea pensioners, places of worship, organic cafes and Infinity Foods.”
The flight-proof, reusable, recycling bins will be distributed to households in due course. Vegans will receive specialist boxes that will reject animal products of any kind, and the Daily Mail.
Cllr Prole said: “The new bins will be microchipped to maximise the use of the latest satellite GPS technology to ensure that only approved bins are collected.
“This will avoid a repeat of what happened in a French drone recycling pilot where much-loved pets were collected up and flown to the depot and accidentally incinerated.”
Green Councillor Saffron Lentil-Rice (they/them), opposition spokesperson for Woke Nonsense, questioned whether the scheme offered value for money and could be carbon neutral.
They also expressed concerns about the drones disturbing local events: “I know that lots of my residents wouldn’t want the annual ethical alpaca racing on Valley Gardens to be disrupted.”
Other parties are critical of the programme too. Former Conservative councillor Iona Bentley said: “What’s wrong with corporal punishment? My husband enjoys it twice weekly but it does come at a price and we are in a cost of living crisis.”
Union rep Bob Buggins noted that the scheme could lead to redundancies at CityClean and a reduction in their service but added that people probably wouldn’t notice any change to the provision “because it’s been shit for years. Everybody out!”
Hanover resident Brenda Tiddler said: “What about the public loos? Will the drones still be in there too? And what about the hippies smoking dope down the Level? Something must be done.”
Well there’s no fooling you lot is there? Yes, this is indeed our April Fool – we’ll try and make it a bit less obvious next year!
Good try!
Very obvious April Fool….although I do love Conservative councillor Iona Bentley!!!
Fantastic x
Brilliant!
Drones quite hard to believe
Council sorting rubbish. Big April fools.
Council expensive. Can’t sort rubbish weeds homelessness graffiti policing crime. Useless
They are the joke
So just to clarify we’re getting recycling drones. But we still don’t have food waste and the visitor parking system is still run on stone tablets
April foo-ools!
Very witty but a tad obvious
Green Councillor Saffron Lentil-Rice (they/them) gave me a chuckle.
For a few lines, you actually got me and then I got confused…. Before realising. April fool!
April fool
another good one would have been a all new fleet of trucks for CityClean. …on a serious note have a look at the amount of broken down trucks every day in the yard. No wonder the crews can’t do their job with sh*t equipment
Loved it! Love an April’s fools! Clocked it when you got to Chelsea pensioners! Gave me a chuckle so thank you!
Nice try but over-egged the pudding a little.